Comparison

The promise of the ideal has the potential to steal the value of that which is really good. The challenge these days is that the “ideal” is presented to us on social all the time that it seems that nothing short of perfection is worthwhile.

My first car was a 3 cylinder, stick shift Geo Metro. It was fire engine red with blue wave decals on the side. You had to gear down on hills if you had passengers in the back. I loved that car. I was proud of that car. The day I got that car I drove that sucker around to people’s houses just to show off how amazing it was.

I remember my first professional baseball game at Exhibition Stadium. We sat in bleachers as the Jays outlasted the Royals in extra innings in a meaningless game on a cool late August evening. Kelly Gruber hit a double to win it as my family, huddled under a blanket because of the cool winds off the lake, cheered him on with the few thousand people who stayed till the end.

I love those memories. They stick in my head and still bring me joy.

Today they wouldn’t be memories. They would be Instagram pictures that would be clearly outdone a person with a cooler car or someone a much better event.

Happiness is no longer is simply an experience. Your level of joy is determined relative to what others are experiencing. It’s not that comparison is a new thing, it’s just that now it’s an instant thing.

You can be on Spring Break having a wonderful time, only to get down because you see pictures of a friend enjoying what seems to be a better time.

You can Tweet out a shot of your new hairdo, which you are proud of, yet if no one else re-tweets or likes it, the hairdo seems less special.

Photoshopped selfies make us feel bad about our real life bodies.

Filters on people’s images make the sunset we share with a loved one less fantastic.

My car was not the coolest, but in that moment, it was awesome for me.

Exhibition stadium was a dump. But that day I didn’t need to know about California stadiums with beaches and waterfalls. All I cared about was that Exhibition stadium was new for me and it was fun!

The instantaneous nature of social media comparison has robbed us of the joy we used to get from real life experiences. We forget that just because another is experiencing something great, what we have might be great as well.

It’s simply not true. We have to re-learn how to enjoy what we have. Happiness is not a comparison scale. Happiness is an emotion.

Watch a dog with a dog laying in the sun, He doesn’t care if there are dogs elsewhere having more fun. He doesn’t stop chewing the bone to check his phone to let others see how great his bone is, or check out if others have a better bone. He just lays there, chewing his bone, loving life.

Celebrate the 10 lbs you lost, regardless of how others look.
Own that Friday night you absolutely loved reading a book with a warm drink. Who cares what party was going on that you didn't want to go to anyway.
Permission yourself to obtain true joy from who you are, what you achieve and what you experience.

Now please... retweet this article so I can feel good that others like me.